searching...

i am on vacation, trying to use my vacation hours before they expire in mid-june. 

as i got ready to check out for a week, the activity level increased to a point where i was truly overwhelmed.  when i got to that elusive moment when i was actually ON VACATION, i closed down - i went from total overload all the way to a complete slow down.

i spent a great weekend with family, wandered around cape cod with joey, eating our way from hyannis to provincetown.  everywhere, it was evident that summer has arrived on the cape.

it was wonderful.

but joey went back to work yesterday and i was feeling pretty lonely out here, just me and the cat. 

on the other hand, i need some alone time. 

my biggest goal for this vacation was to figure out how to go forward

with less frenzy, more peace. 

so i took a ride to the bay beaches at sunset,

hoping for some pictures that could give me a direction for my future. 

it was beautiful, quiet, peaceful...

after i got home to the cottage, i went online to see what the

 'beyond layers' challenge was for the week. 

it is QUOTE week - each day has a word prompt

and the goal is to find a quote for the word

and, in whatever way you want, absorb the quote for the day.

i was late but not too late to make that happen -

the word was peace and

i believe that for a little while, if not forever,

i found it :)

a great quote from martin luther king and 'golden' texture from kim klassen

obsessed...

for the past nine months, i have been trying to teach myself photoshop. this is not an easy thing to figure out on your own.  in an effort to learn stuff faster, i started poking around the internet. i followed blogs, read 'recipes'... and i experimented.  endlessly.

this week, it became an O B S E S S I O N.

being that i am on vacation, i wanted to go to cape cod but that didn't happen. i didn't read a book or take a walk, or go for a ride, or go shopping, or even watch HGTV.  nope.  didn't do much of anything, except experiment with photoshop.   i got up at 530am and went to bed at 11pm.  with my computer on my lap.

i am exhausted but i learned a lot.  and mostly from kim klassen.  her website and blog, along with the people that post there, have not only been a great resource for learning, but also a huge source of inspiration.  and because of how much i already learned there, i decided to take a photoshop class from kim klassen cafe.  a real class.  i already signed up, i paid and i committed.   i am scared (commit?? eeeek!) but more than that,  i am really excited!

now i have to figure out how to retain what i learn... not only on photoshop but on blogger, too.  i have to start over, re-learn, every time i use it.  i need a hard drive accessory thing for my brain, with a folder for how-to's...

meantime, i am posting some experiments... hopefully, i can remember some of how i created them :)

a m a z i n g...

time to catch up...
its been a busy 100 days since i wrote on here. 
its a beautiful morning, sun is shining and sky is blue. the storms are gone, and so is the humidity.

birds are chirping,

bunnies are snacking on the grass...

i'm sitting at cape cod, still amazed that we did it.  bought a house? with land to garden?? at the cape???  wow.  it is really hard to believe, doesn't feel real most of the time. 

i remember when we were as close to homeless as i ever want to be. we got a place, but slept on the floor for six months because we couldn't afford a bed.  ate tomatoes from a neighbors garden for breakfast lunch and dinner because we couldn't afford food. 

we have much to be thankful for... besides our family and our health, both first on the long list of things i appreciate. but we are employed. we have worked hard, saved - money and stuff - and now can bring a dream to life.   a m a z i n g...

a house at the cape.  i remember coming here as a kid, it was bigger than Christmas morning, more exciting than our birthday... a week of beaches, games in the cottage at night, singing in the car, sand in the pants, exploring on the rainy days...  we all cherish those memories and thank mom and dad for the joy that we all remember as cape cod back then.  

and i thank them again for the joy of cape cod today.  without them, and their legacies, i would not be sitting on my couch at the cape on this beautiful morning.  i hope, mom and dad, you are here with me now.  i hope you see how you touch my life, our lives, the whole family, still today... 

you may be gone from our sight but not from the cape. as you brought us here when we were kids, we each bring you here each time we come back... 
memories for a lifetime.
a m a z i n g....

change of plans...

all i wanted to do on my vacation was wander and ponder.
but somewhere in the my brain was a list of things i intended to get done on my vacation such as garden, paint the office, introduce outside guy to the inside gang, go to cape cod and buy a house, take pictures and submit to the big contest at work, start exercising, write more...
so i started off by breaking my arm...

i believe that changes the plans. the whole list is up in the air. i have to figure out some new techniques for brushing my teeth or feeding the cats. or feeding myself, for that matter.

i believe that now, i may just wander and ponder...
not a bad way to spend my vacation after all,,,

hanging by a thread...

a week of vacation is calling my name...and i am answering that call with every cell in my body.

i don't go on vacation officially until friday night.
but the relaxed and FREE marie is standing at that finish line and waving me on.
i see her.
i want to be her.
i am almost desparate to be her...

the problem is to stay mentally at work until that moment.
it ain't easy...